We just started a brand new year and I was wondering how yours is going so far...because mine started off with a bang! I'm feeling more settled and more positive than I have for a while. But that didn't just "happen." There's a trick to shifting things from negative to positive in life...and I'm going to tell you what it is.
If you're like me, you like to use the new year for a fresh start. But how do we make a fresh start when nothing has changed? How do we create something wonderful out of the same old "shit" we're trying to leave behind? And how do we let go of what we have now to reach for what we can't yet see?
Well, I can tell you it's really not that hard; we just have to know how. So let me tell you my little secret: Changing your life starts with not doing. Once you master the "not doing," you have the space to bring in the "doing" that you want.
Most people are so focused on what to do that they overlook what not to do. But this is important! If we keep doing the same things we've always done, we'll keep getting the same things we've always gotten.
Here are five things not to do in this new year:
1. Don't choose short-term solutions any more. Make long term choices. Example: if you want to lose 10 pounds, don't rely on "quickie diets" that result in short-term weight loss. Take steps to change your life style for long-term weight management instead, like learn to prepare ahead of time "grab and go" meals that are healthy — egg bites, sliced fruit or fruit salads, smoothies, cubed ham or chicken, quinoa, boiled eggs, nuts, lettuce wraps with fun fillings, etc.
2. Don't accept hurtful behavior towards you. Set clear boundaries. Example: if you allow your mate, family or friends to put you down, stop. Tell them you will no longer accept their putdowns and walk away from the "relationship" if you must.
3. Don't make excuses to stay small. Stand in your highest truth. Example: if someone close to you judges or diminishes you for taking positive steps, let them know you believe in yourself and won't let their doubts stop you!
4. Don't let your fear stop you. Find a way back to your confidence and personal power. Example: if you are afraid to make a change because you don't know where it will lead, talk to trusted friends or professionals who can help you come up with a doable game plan you can feel good about.
5. Don't run the same bad habits you ran last year. Shift your energy to feed what serves you. Example: if you had a habit of staying online too many hours in a day, cut your internet time in half and fill the "extra" time with things that truly nourish you in the long run, like preparing those healthy "grab and go" meals you want, taking up yoga, meditating, exercising, walking in nature, hanging out with dear friends, making art, reading a spiritual book, learning a new skill, etc. Then cut your internet time in half again so you give more time to what truly nourishes you.
Devote yourself to these five "not doings" and you'll be amazed at how different your life becomes. Then next new year's eve, you'll look back and have so much to feel good about and be proud of!
Remember: if you change nothing, nothing changes.
Today in particular (January 10th) is a great day to release what doesn't serve you and begin something new that does because it's a full moon and a lunar eclipse—the perfect frequency of energy for bringing things to completion, releasing what doesn't serve you, and getting closure for old loose ends to clear space for what you want.